Why Any Movie from Twilight Series is Better than Inception

  • The Plot : Inception plot is a heist in a dream. Kinda like Heat meets The City of the Lost Children. Boring.  Twilight series is all about high school forbidden jackass love story involving Vampire and Human, with timeless classic conflict between Vampire and Werewolf on the side. Amazing, awesome and brilliant. Nobody wrote this kind of story before. Epic!
  • The Cast : While Inception is filled with bunch of B-Class unknown actor/actresses like Leonardo DiCaprio, Ken Watanabe, Michael Caine, Tom Harding, Joseph Gordon Levitt, Marion Contillard, Cillian Murphy, Ellen Page, or even Tom Berenger, Twilight series is packed with a lot of future Oscar nominees laying all over the place. For instance Robert Pattinson, the main star. He even got his own wax statue at Madame Tussauds museum and nominated for BBC Radio 1 Teen Awards,  in Best Dressed and Best Actor Category. Kristen Stewart is extraordinary expressive with her performance in all twilight movies. Some people even said that she is the young Meryl Streep. And don’t forget Tyler Lautner, the future Slyvester Stallone. Nobody, I meant nobody had a triple A class acting and body in the same page as this guy. The rest of the cast is as powerful as the main cast. The talented screamer Dakota Fanning, Spiderman’sGirlfriend Bryce Dallas Howard or the greatest young star ever, Peter Facinelli. I shit you not, I’m not making up all of this. Go ahead and watch all the twilight series in the cinema. Nobody screamed like a mad man everytime DiCaprio or Gordon Levitt shows their nose in the screen. But everytime Pattinson or Lautner showing off their asses, a little bit of peck, or hair nose, everybody screamed and hysteric, like Tyranosaurus suddenly pop up out of nowhere.
  • While Inception had a TOTEM as the bridge between all the scene, twilight had Vampire Skin which could glows when exposed in the sun. Exceptional and very beautiful ideas.
  • Action Scene. Inception is 148 minutes long. When the 148 hits the mark, people already getting bored with all the monolog in it, with no single action scene can be found in those 148 minutes. Every Twilight movies is overflowing with manly, macho, godzilla fighting scene. Even though the tag line is like a chick movie, Twilight series actually is Rambo in disguise. There’s even a scene where Robert Pattinson pick up an entire gang of werewolf, one by one, samurai style. A Tribute to Rambo and Seven Samurai.
  • Inception is concepted by Christopher Nolan. His work before Inception is Memento, Insomnia, Batman Begins, The Prestige, and the Dark Knight, nobody  watch all those pretentious shit. Twilight is written by Stephanie Myers. Meyer was the biggest selling author of both 2008 and 2009, having sold over 29 million books in 2008 alone,with Twilight being the best-selling book of the year.She sold an additional 26.5 million books in 2009, making her the first author to achieve this feat in that year.Meyer was ranked #49 on Time magazine’s list of the “100 Most Influential People in 2008”,and was also included in the Forbes Celebrity 100 list of the world’s most powerful celebrities in 2009, entering at #26. Her annual earnings exceeded $50 million.Also in 2010, Forbes ranked her as the #59 most powerful celebrity with annual earnings of $40 million. That enough to guarantee the quality of the script right?
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18 Comments

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18 responses to “Why Any Movie from Twilight Series is Better than Inception

  1. Alright, its obvious you didn’t pay any attention to Inception when you wrote this.

    Lesse here: Well, at least in your first point you said that “Nobody wrote this kind of story before.”, you were talking about Inception, because there are TONS of books on teen-age paranormal romance. Twilight just happens to be the worst.

    Your second point: Really. B-List actors? We’re talking about Leonardo DiCaprio, Micheal Caine, Joseph-Gordon Levitt, Marion Cottillard and Tom Hardy. People who can actually do more than, lets say, stare at each other the entire movie. These are the actors that define acting as an art-form, and a medium. Don’t embarrass yourself by trying to insult them.
    “Kristen Stewart is extraordinary expressive with her performance in all twilight movies.” HAHAHAAA! Okay, I can’t even read that with a straight face. You know, men showing their abs and women staring at said men throughout the entire movie isn’t acting.

    “Nobody screamed like a mad man everytime DiCaprio or Gordon Levitt shows their nose in the screen. But everytime Pattinson or Lautner showing off their asses, a little bit of peck, or hair nose, everybody screamed and hysteric, like Tyranosaurus suddenly pop up out of nowhere.” We didn’t scream because we’re not pre-teen girls who freak out every time we see a model with minimal acting skills step on screen. I mean, yeah I get your point, Twilight was made for hyper, clingy, over-excited pre-teen girls, Inception was made for mature young-adults you can contain themselves when an attractive member of the opposite sex appears on screen.

    Your Third:……I honestly don’t see what point you’re trying to make. Are you saying that a “vampire” doing his Tinkerbell impression is better than Inception?

    Your Fourth: ….”no single action scene can be found in those 148 minutes.” huh? Alright, you either didn’t see Inception, or your definition of action is “Two albino actors staring at each other whilst one makes creepy remarks on how he watches the other sleep.”

    Your Fifth: “….nobody watch all those pretentious shit.” You mean, you?

    It honestly sounds like you’re saying “The concepts of Christopher Nolan’s movies were too advanced for my feeble mind to comprehend.” I mean, really? Pretentious shit? The guy who directed the 3rd highest grossing movie in America AND one of the greatest sci-fi thrillers in history is pretentious? Alright, lesse here: Nolan revived Batman from the hell that was Batman and Robin (making the Dark Knight Trilogy one of the most iconic trilogies in cinema, and also giving A LOT of creditability to superhero movies as a whole), he gave Robin Williams creditability as a villain, and he made simple concepts like insomnia, dreaming, amnesia and illusionists/escape artists into advanced, interesting thrillers! I mean, Inception is the kind of movie that makes you think about it’s concept after the second viewing (you uh, kinda have to watch it at least twice to get the full gist of it)!

    Everyone, including Robert Pattinson, hates Twilight, but I can only find three good things about Twilight:
    1) Meyer makes the interesting decision of having a “side-kick” (as in the literary archetype) as the main character (even though it backfired on her)
    2) It at least makes hyper, clingy-girls read.
    3) Its full of so much BS, you could make a makeshift Kevlar vest out of it, and walk out of a fire-fight in one piece.
    Take those things away, what do you get? A piece of shit that’s the biggest set-back in feminism since the sandwich.

  2. @ Johar, The funniest shit is that you managed to find something good about twilight where I can’t find even itsy bitsy little bit goody stuff about that garbage..LOL…

  3. Thirteen

    Honestly.
    Firstly: High school romance, vampires, werewolves. Those are boring. Mainstream. Stories about dreams, however, aren’t that common. Any time, any bookstore, you could walk up to the first shelf, pick out the first book, boom. Supernatural romance. I don’t see how it hasn’t been written by anyone else before.
    Next: B-class? Are you kidding me? Leonardo DiCaprio was in the freaking Titanic, one of the most popular love story there is. Joseph Gordon-Levitt was in 50/50, Premium Rush and The Dark Knight Rises. Michael Caine, Ellen Page, Tom HARDY and many other ACTUAL AWARD-WINNING actors and actresses. And honestly. Kristen Stewart is best known for her expressionless face. One expression for the ENTIRE series. And do you know why no one screamed like a crazed fangirl when they saw DiCaprio’s or Gordon-Levitt’s nose or whatever part of their body? Because Inception is for MATURE young adults. Twilight, on the other hand? Twilight is for fangirls who have no life and pretend that Edward or Jacob would come for them and whisk them off to wherever.
    How is a man taking of his shirt so he can SPARKLE an “exceptional and beautiful idea”? And FYI Jacob is so not a werewolf. Those who are werewolves can’t turn into werewolves at will. They only change once a month, when the full moon comes. They can’t control it.
    You are kidding me. How did Inception have no action scene. The van chase, the no gravity scene, the snow fortress, Limbo. How were those boring? Either you slept through the entire movie or was too busy fangirling over Twilight to come up with this review. Yeah, so grown men staring at each other, standing around growling at each other is like, in your perspective, best fight scenes ever.
    Nobody watched Inception huh? Inception, for your information, is one of the highest-grossing films of all time, grossed over $800 MILLION worldwide with just that ONE movie.
    The Dark Knight was considered one of the best superhero movie of all time. And you say no one watches it.

    This review, truly, has been one of the most humorous one I’ve read. Probably top of the chart. And as Mr/Ms Johar said, you’re actually implying that the movie is too concept for you, too detailed. I wouldn’t be surprised as you watch Twilight as all it teaches you is basically how important it is to have a boyfriend and you are nothing without a man. Even Robert Pattinson hates it. Inception is not only a sci-fi thriller. It also tells of the love of Dom and Mal. Inception will and always will be the best sci-fi thriller of all time. So if you could just take a moment just to watch the damn thing, you’d see that there is more to just having a boyfriend. Or a sparkly fairy princess boyfriend.

    And FYI, I’m twelve in 2013 so I watched Inception when I was 9. And I totally understood it.

  4. Golam Rafsan jani

    Leonardo DiCaprio is a B- class actor ????? HaHaHa ….don’t mind … you r mad ….Watch Inception carefully then write about this .Inception is one of the greatest movie ever made & Leonardo is one of the greatest actor.

  5. Golam Rafsan jani

    oh sorry man …I understand ur sarcasm…don’t mind for my writing …carry on 😀

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